Ok, so remember I said, like wayyyy back in my earlier post that you don’t just forget someone, you get used to their absence is all? And that ‘time’ wasn’t helping as it’s supposed to. Well, I was wrong. Time does help. Trust me. Sure, I never thought while writing that post that time would actually make it all go away, but it did. I love how time works. Ok, I don’t believe in linear concept of time. Nada. I don’t. How do we know for sure, that past isn’t really our future? Or future, our past? You know how patterns of behaviour last? Through this seemingly seamless time. From past to present to future, we carry those patterns and keep looking at them in the eye. But every time that patterns appears, it carries with it, the seed to break out of the pattern. Therefore it isn’t as though it’s a culmination of some strong symphony, or evolution, but every seed a potential for different kinds of breaking out of pattern. I love Hegel for his philosophy on dialectic. I mean, sure, we all know, how we go back and forth on our decisions, but for him to have said dialectical movement (force and anti-force– tug of war– a new force produced) carries within itself the seed for a opposite force to take birth and show that whether it’s self destruction that you are onto or on a path of enlightenment, each step is ripe with an anti- force is beautiful philosophy. There is no losing or winning, because in the end it gives rise to a new force anyway.
Time does wonders in helping you move on, and I don’t mean break-ups, although I am guessing this is how they work too, but also badly done presentations, embarrassing moments, encounters with back stabbing idiots. Time is the medicine. But in all of this, what I have learnt is to accept ageing not as an increasing number or bodily changes but as something that assists you in being you more and more. According to most beauty ads, 25 is the age when skin shows signs of ageing and I am supposed to apply their creams. For one, I have since the age of 9 had lines under my eyes, not because of ageing but because I drink very less water. If they go away, I might even miss them. I have always been the youngest student or employee, youngest everywhere except family functions (laughs), but “that won’t last”, said a guy called Daniel. It’s true, but what will last is this incredible talent to be yourself no matter where you are.
You know how people above a certain age crack inappropriate jokes all the time but no one bats an eyelid? They are comfortable in their own skin. For instance, for those who watch Elka (Hot in Cleveland), cannot help but fall in love with her for being so unpretentious. She is so, well, herself, and so lovely. I want that. I want to be me, not that there is a single me. There is a never a single you. You are a whole of different parts. Not that the whole is greater than the sum of parts, ‘Gestalt’ is always interpreted in a wrong manner, it means, whole is different from the sum of parts. Not more, so the ‘I’ that we talk about in such a confident manner is a rather supple, flexible, ever changing thing.
The ‘I’ that I was a year back is different from what I am today. Not to say that the then I is more authentic than the I today, or tomorrow. Authenticity is a tricky word. What is more authentic than me giving the I today, yesterday, and tomorrow the validation that yes, all those I(s) have always been me? But with a markedly different approach towards life and experiences in all those states of time. It’s a story unfolding, the I. The You. And we don’t know how it is going to go, we don’t know how it is going to end. We can only make informed decisions and choices that get the nod from conscience and consciousness.
Time, my friends, is the best gift of God. Yes, there is a God. I can’t even begin to fathom how the universe operates without that God. Whether we see God in our own ‘Quark’ or in the daily on goings of life. There is a God. And for those say “pbbft, it’s evolution, there is no God.” Now, are you telling me that Science is self evolving? Don’t you and I have anything to do with the knowledge produced? And don’t even get me started on why only certain kinds of knowledge is valorised.
The universe is a cosmic phenomenon and science does not help the universe. We only seem to screw it up. People (scientists and researchers) explain this gigantic cosmic creation to us, normal human beings, and they call it science.. Hell, we could be so wrong about so many things. Remember all those times, when they said earth was flat? We make science. Evolution is a scientific explanation/ term for a phenomenon that occurs, and only God knows why.